Tuesday 17 December 2013

Terrible 2's? No. Tyrannical 2's.

As you know, my boys are my entire world, and I try very hard to keep up with the triumphs, and trials of their lives, with a genuine elated smile or a reassuring and supportive one when necessary. With two kiddos in school full time, it can be a bit tricky remembering who they are friends with this week and who they aren’t anymore. The easiest one by far is Ds3 who is at home with momma all day long, which gives me time to devote all of my attention on him while his brothers are at school, and allows me to know who his buddies are and which one is his current favourite at all times. My little Ds3 is probably the sweetest and cutest little guy out there. He has these big, kissable chubby cheeks, these sweet rosy lips that pucker up when he concentrates, Adorable sandy blond curls, and these huge expressive eyes with thick dark lashes that somehow don’t tangle up when he blinks. He is a tiny cherub...


...And unfortunately he has become aware of this, and uses it to his advantage....



All. The. Freaking. Time.


And without fail (like most parents of toddlers), I fall for it, hook line and sinker.


Lately, he and his former best friend (the puppy from one of our previous posts) had some sort of disagreement, which led Ds3 to immediately stop speaking to it, throw it in the laundry room and never look back. I believe that this is the first time I’ve had to deal with one of my kids “dumping” someone... hopefully I’ll remember how to handle it when it involves a real person later on. Fortunately, he has found someone else to fill the position of “BFF” and has become best friends with a stuffed frog, named Mr. Proggy, which he takes everywhere with him (a few times, he’s tried to take his frog “smimming”, which did not end well).
This friendship is so sweet, that anyone who sees them play together will immediately develop no less than 4 cavities and need serious dental work. He talks to his frog, “feeds” him snacks, tucks him into bed, tries to include him in all things DS3, and is surprisingly possessive and protective of him. This is the probably one of cutest things that any of my kids has ever done and I think of it as no less than angelic.



Lately though, my sweet angel has turned into some sort of terrorist who is hell bent on being the boss, is never wrong, and owning absolutely everything under the blasted sun. It was adorable the first time he possessively told me “No Momay, dat DS3’s Proggy!”. Sure I was a little taken back by the suddenness of it all, however I took it in stride and used it to show him the respect he deserves, and agreed that the frog is his, and that I should have asked first before touching it. I swear this went straight to his head because ever since that fateful day, EVERYTHING is now Ds3’s including control, and if you take it away from him, he WILL tell Grandma on you.


The initial cuteness of it wore off quickly and has since turned into some sort of strange power struggle... with a demon no less... over every little thing imaginable.


Time for dinner where Proggies aren’t allowed? “NO MOMAY!! DAAAADDDYYY!!!! MOMAY TAKIN’ AWAY DS3’S PROGGY!!!”
Time to put the boots on when he doesn’t want to? “NOOO DADDY!! MOOOMMMAAAYYY!!! DADDY WANTS DS3’S WITE DAARE!!” (Don’t worry if you don’t follow, it’s hard for even me to understand his logic there)


He’s cold, but doesn’t like clothes? “NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! DS3 NO WAAAANNN KEEEN SHIIIIRRRRTT!!!! GWAAAAAMMMAAA!!! MOMAY TOUCHIN’ DS3’S SHIIIIIIRRRRTT!!!!”
Time to eat? “NO!” Time to go to bed? “NO!!” Ds3 must share his toys? “NO!!” Let your brother sit there please? “NOO!!!” Stop kicking your brother? “NO! GWAAMMAA!! MOMAY MAKIN’ DS3 SAD!”


I officially hate that tiny two-lettered negative but find myself using it more and more when people try to talk to me.



This leaves me pondering where my sweet little cherub went, and who the hell thought it’d be funny to replace him with this scary little tyrant.


(Like seriously, I'm about finished with this "being the adult all the time" business. I would very much like to just hide in my blanket fort with a flashlight, a box of cookies and a comic book or five)

-One Awesome Mommy

Thursday 16 May 2013

Mondays Madness was MAD

SORRY for the lateness!!

You see, Monday's post was almost ready to post then I went and decided to be a hero.

I am trying to build a chicken coop for our 10 chickens and 11 ducklings.. currently, they're homeless and are living in a large dog crate inside the house which is messy, noisy and a LOT of work with 3 kids running about. Thankfully they have only been spending their nights inside and they live outside during the day. Anyways, I'm trying to build a chicken coop but its definitely not easy given the material that I have on hand and also the amount of help I have (my "victims" as I've been mentally calling them). So the coop is to be rather large. One wall is approximately 8ft tall and weighs a good 70lbs or so as its made of solid wood and not even plywood.

I am not all that tall. I'm 5'6" at most and am proud of it, and dont actually look like the 1st picture that I posted. I'm also not nearly as strong as I had thought I was because while moving this wall which was too heavy for me... any anyone with more than 2 braincells would have seen that it was obviously a two-person job.

Now. I did a few pretty silly things here. A) I was dragging the wall, and B) I was not looking where I was going, which is why THIS happened:

As it was happening, time slowed to a crawl and I thought two things 1) I had forgotten my cellphone in the house and 2) I had also been dumb enough to not tell anyone what I was doing as I had planned on only being outside for 10 minutes while my kiddos ate their lunch. My next thoughts were...



And then I saw the dog. Oh the dog! The dog!! They're supposed to be our best friends and are supposed to help us when we're in trouble right? Right? 


I would have laughed had I not had 70lbs of wall crushing me. I will admit it.. I started panicking. A lot. I couldnt help it. I left my only real lifeline in the house and didnt tell anyone that I was going to be outside. Thankfully, I managed to wiggle free.
I went to the hospital and got a full-body x-ray. Thankfully, nothing is broken, I'm just bruised and slightly beaten up by the wall. I learned a good lesson or three that day. 1) NEVER try to do a two-person job by yourself, especially if its to do something dumb like prove a point. 2) ALWAYS tell people where you are going and what you are doing and 3) My dog need a Tic-Tac or 5 cuz her breath should be registered as a deadly weapon! All kidding aside, I figure that having my cellphone glued to my body isnt all THAT bad an idea. *sigh* at least I'm on the mend and will be posting another entry tomorrow, and on Sunday to make it up to you guys :)

Saturday 11 May 2013

Guest Blog by Gabe D. "Untitled"

Hello!! Still not up to making my own posts here due to the current goings on. So anyways, I have another guest blog today. This time it comes from my fellow artist Gabe D. He has a really funny comic called "Funny Thing Happened Today". I've been following it ever since his wife told me about it on a forum that she and I are part of. He has a podcast!!! Oh how I aspire to draw at this type level. 

Thank you Gabe for the relatively short-notice post!! I owe ya one bud!!

-Oneawesomemom aka Mandy


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey Y'all,

I'm Gabe. Father of one. A girl. Three years old. Nice to meet you.

My wife is beautiful and wonderful and I am so grateful that she would
waste her life on a putz like me. As such it is my pleasure to show my
gratitude in any way possible. The easiest way,of course, is to
provide her with favors. Pretty much anything she wants (if it is in
my power) she gets.

I'm not always happy to perform the favor, but I do it. Because I love
her and I am grateful for her and I want her to know it.

It's been a nice system. She feels appreciated, and I get to stay
married to her. Everybody wins.

Now, we have a little girl (3).

And she is absolutely the spitting image of her mother. Her mother is
the one who works, and I am the one who stays home to rear her. But
there is a problem. As the at-home parent, it is my duty to rear her
properly, meaning, teach her the word "no", and make sure it sticks.

The break-down is that she has her mother's face. I have never said no
to her mother.  I know, on a conscious level, that this is not my
wife, this is my child. She must learn.  On a subconscious level,
however, she has my wife's personality, mannerisms, and her face.

So sure sweetheart, cake would make a great breakfast. Want cookies
for lunch? We can do that. Oh, you don't want to go to bed yet? Okay,
30 more minutes. Okay an hour. Then right to bed!  10 more minutes?
okay.

Friday 10 May 2013

Guest Blog "Wasted Frills " by Cousin CW



G'day readers! I am unable to post today (I'll blog about why for Monday's post) so  I've asked my cousin to guest for me today. Also (and completely unexpectedly) my laptop's keyboard decided to stop working.... I am typing with the onscreen keyboard until it is fixed by DH... so without further adieu, here is today's entry and a picture of kittens... just  because
*sidenote* although I am getting used to typing  with this onscreen keyboard, it is still annoying as @#$^!!!!! 

A HUGE thank you to my cousin CW for today's entry
love, Oneawesomemom, aka Mandy  

~~~~~~~~~~
 
Wasted Frills

Hello, I am guest blogger 27, cousin of this blog host.

Unlike her, I am the father of 2 girls and 1 boy.  16, 8 and son is 10. I am a K-5 Art teacher. I am not a know it all do gooder about children and their ways. I have become an observer, nay, a slave to how they roll. As readers must know, the cost of living has not gone down, no matter where we live and wages may trickle up at a snail’s pace. That is if one is lucky to even have a job. Anyhow, 8 yr-old daughter has this tendency to waste stuff. She’ll waste anything from food to dishes, toys to shampoo…all very costly needs.  She is not meager in grades nor in motor skills, she is actually awesome. But like with any person, she has flaws. She has a problem. She is addicted to sugar and making messes. I have found a trail of sugar packets throughout the house, lemon peels and food wrappers in the most secretive of places: under her bed, in the attic, in her closet and in spots of the basement. I’ve even caught her throwing garbage on the ground she ate on, scolded her, and listened to her whine how she didn’t do anything and wasn’t meaning to. Surprised, I’ve offered incentives like movies, parks, dollar store and an allowance but this one is too content to remain sloppy and in shear denial. The latest deed she did not do was take a shower and dump out all of the shampoo and conditioner in the tub to make bubbles. She has done this before and has been reprimanded but to no avail. Mama is at wits end with these antics and I scratch my head. I’m in threatening mode. I threatened to video her while making a mess or while she throws a tantrum and showing it to her teacher. Teacher loves and respects her and places her on a pedestal. I did mention my daughter is awesome. So she would probably faint if she seen how daughter turns into Mrs. Hyde at home. Daughter is cute as a button and equally charismatic, and I don’t wish to treat her with kids gloves but I feel like we are fast approaching an impasse. We’ve modeled, rewarded and encouraged her in many ways as well scolded, teased, negatively reinforced stuff yet her response is defiant. It’s not just a kid thing anymore, nor do I feel in denial of being too passive or being too politically correct as we say in the States. All I can say is it’s not just a boy thing, nor are teachers of little ones, the ultimate parents. We have problems rearing our own kids too.

-CW (Oneawesomemom's cousin)
~~~
Kittens !!!!


Wednesday 8 May 2013

Update and what's been happening

I apologize profusely for not updating more. Things have been rather hectic here since my last post, but fear not, I managed to type and draw up quite a few posts in between then and now. I pretty much have been focusing on DS3's health and new diet restrictions and not on blogging (or school.. ulp!) but everything's ok now so we can resume the 2-3 posts a week, starting with today's!!

As you can probably tell, today's blog is about DS3. He was born a bit of an oddball and cant have a BM easily or even on a regular schedule. Our doctor suspects a rare condition called Hierschprung Disease (HD) which, in laymans terms, means that a section of his lower intestines are not working properly and cause him a great deal of pain when he does finally have a BM... Anyways, he recently had minor surgery to get a biopsy on his intestines and to unblock his tract as it appeared to be absolutely full... I'll spare the details, but the day of the surgery I was a complete mess and even moreso, was an absolute wreck when they actually came to take him in... so was DH.

 Unfortunately, as soon as he was out of sight... I completely lost it and broke down.. thank god DH was there to comfort me.


The surgery only took a little while.. less than an hour really... and he was so upset about the whole ordeal that he cried even more than I did when he woke up... Ok.. so did I.


So we went home after an hour or so in recovery, and they told us that he may be a little sleepy and to just let him sleep if he was. So he sleep he did...

And sleep...
And sleep... but finally...

He practically SPRANG out of bed, his poor puppy (who actually went in for surgery WITH him) got tossed aside... he gingerly crawled into my bed and he and I cuddled all day after that. If there is anything that this experience taught me, its that as much as he drives me crazy... I think that I'd be a broken shell of a person if something serious were to ever happen to any one of my Boyz. I love them with every single cell in my body, and they are my everything


Friday 22 February 2013

Bathtime Blues

I follow lots of other blogs, one of them is Parenting: Illustrated With Crappy Pictures This is quite possibly one of the most hilarious blogs out there!! Seriously! Read it! It makes me chuckle just thinking about it!! 

I also read a few others, but this is the one that never fails to crack me up. Anyways, one theme I've noticed in most other mom-blogs is the lack of bathtime blues related posts... They post about stuff like


Nothing wrong with that.. cuz ya know.. posting stuff about kids in a bath on the internet is something to be debated about for sure. However, I have a question to ask so I'm gonna post about MY ordeal with bathtime just cuz I can. So, my little DS2 and his brothers will play hard, all day, and all evening right up until its time to go to bed. Last I heard, its completely normal.. right? Right? They'll run, jump, do somersaults, tumble about, play with the dog, roll around in the dirt (one of them will eat it too.. ugh!) and they'll build forts, drag their little bodies around on the ground like baby seals.. ya know.. boy stuff.


Anyways, back during my 1st post, I mentioned that DS2 hated baths. I highly doubt that anyone ever thought that his hatred of bathtime was nearly as bad as it really is tho. I can tell him that its time for a bath.. and this is the reaction that I will ALWAYS get:


Which means that I almost always have to make him take a bath by chasing him around, trying to undress him while he wiggles and runs away, physically carrying him into the bathroom while he kicks and screams and carries on..


Getting soap in MY eyes and in MY hair, holding him down while dumping water on his head to wash his hair, getting soaked in the process and having my eardrums ruptured while he screams and carries on during this entire process.. All while saying out loud "Calm down, its ok, just breathe."..... I still am not sure if I'm saying it to him or to myself to keep myself from joining him in his screaming and flailing about.


The entire ordeal usually ends in one or both of us crying and running away.. him to his room to hug his "Big Fat Luigi" and me to my candy stash to keep my nerves calm...


It never fails.. Thankfully, I've learned that he's okay with me sponge-bathing him.. however his beautiful long hair is an issue, and sometimes, sponge-baths just dont cut it.. so we start this horrible ordeal all over again. So my question is... do you readers have issues with bath time? Or is it just my nutbar? Its frustrating, and loud, and wet and I'm getting tired of the whole process so I'd like a better way if possible.



Wednesday 13 February 2013

Selective Hearing/Love Day/Candy

I figure I'd start today's post off by talking about boys and their lack of ears. Well, that's hardly fair. They physically HAVE ears, but for some reason, USING them is very hit or miss. For example, if I were to try to QUIETLY open a Snickers Bar and eat it in another room of the house with the TV blaring away at me in BOTH the livingroom and the bedroom, while the boys (and that means the kids and DH) were engrossed in whatever program is on the television (or in DS3's case, napping)... BAM!! They hear it and immediately want some of MY candy. That's right, I said MY candy. As in, not YOURS.


Lets get one thing straight. Everyone has their vices... some people have smoking, some people have that daily beer, some people gamble, and some people clean too much... I do none of those things I chew my fingernails, and I like candy. I like only certain KINDS of candy, and I don't like to share it. With anyone. Ever.

The point is, that anyone who knows me personally, knows that its a bit of a privilege if I share MY candy with them. More of an honor really.. because I buy myself "the good stuff" (Chews, Nerds, Laffy-Taffy, War Heads, BLUE Sour Keys, Sour Patch Kids, Cherry Blasters, Fuzzy Peaches, Swedish Berries, and those weird banana and strawberry flavored marshmallow-y things that have a variety of names.. just to name a few) and then I buy the "sacrificial" candy which includes small, easily found quantities of the above-named candy, plus a bit of whatever else is on sale that I don't particularly like... you have been warned.

I'm totally getting off topic here. My kids have serious selective hearing! I can whisper that I want DH to buy more Chews to re-stock my cache (don't judge me!!) and all of a sudden DS1 and DS2 come FLYING out of nowhere "Can I have some too?!" Ohhhh but how things change when I ask them to clean anything up!!

Which usually prompts me to ask a few more times, and suddenly, there is the dreaded silence, and I start to wonder...

After what feels like forever, and STILL no response, I get mad....

However, out of no where (and always mid-rant) my hero comes and diffuses the situation...

 
God I love him...

Tuesday 12 February 2013

Snow Days

So this is more of a flashback from last Friday than a "new" entry, but ya know. We live in the part of Ontario that the weather takes random, unpredictable turns. One day, it can be hot, windy, raining and snowing.. before noon. One such day happened last Friday... which meant that we had the dreaded Canadian Snow Day. Which in turn meant....



I am not a morning person. I have never been a morning person. As a matter of fact, I strongly believe that whoever invented "mornings" before 10am should in fact be shot. I am not someone who can spring out of bed bright and early and hit the gym.. oh god no.. I'm more like... one of the people you have to PRY from their beds with a crowbar and then watch out so that your head doesn't get bitten off.

My kids on the other hand....


On such days, my mornings are pretty much shot right from the start. The good news is that it gives me a head start on my chores. I could get the laundry started and folded, cook a nice hot breakfast, run some errands, wash the floors and be done before 10am!! Well.. at least that's what normal people would say because this is the expectation:

 
Oh come on, I'm a realist.. anyone with more than one kid (especially boys) knows that its completely preposterous to think that they'd be "quietly" playing by themselves... Anyways... I hard to pry myself out of bed in the mornings. I try hard I do! But the bed just calls my name, it loves me, its true!!! There's nothing more rewarding than a job well done.. Honest!! Even this bed-lover thinks so!! However, this is more along the lines of what actually happens:
 

Yeeeaahh... I think that I'll try this "stepford mom" thing in some other lifetime.

Monday 11 February 2013

Its A Living


Hello, my name is Amanda and I'd like to introduce to you my life... which is overrun by boys. Even our dog is a boy! Don't get me wrong though, I am absolutely not complaining about it. Quite frankly, I've tried to live with other girls before and it ended in disaster!!


Actually, its pretty nice living with boys. The household members are as follows:

Daddy.. he's a 30 year old Virgo, a self-proclaimed genius/ know-it-all and the love of my life. He will never admit to it, but he's afraid of the doctor's and is a great father to my children and a great partner to have around.. especially when I cant reach stuff on the top shelf of the cupboard.

 
Then there is Darling Son #1 (aka DS1)...  He is 7 years old, he's a bit of an excitable spaz and he loves Minecraft and hates math. His favorite color is blue. He aspires to be a policeman because he wants to be able to drive a car with lights on it.


Darling Son #2 (DS2) comes next. He is 3 years old and is a kid who has a chronic case of the giggles. He finds humor in just about everything, even when its inappropriate. He hates bath time with a passion but likes get dirty. He's got long hair and a goofy grin. He wants to go to school so badly that its all he talks about.


Darling Son #3 (DS3). This guy is my baby. He's 1, but will be 2 in a couple of weeks. He's stubborn, he's smart and he's sooooooooooooooooooooooo cute... and he knows it. He hates being told what to do, but loves to sing and dance and make a mess lol.


Life couldn't get any crazier, but ya know. Its what I signed up for isn't it?

As for me... Well.. My hair's a mess, I haven't showered in peace since I was 19, and I fell asleep in my cereal this morning because we ran out of coffee. 

But I wouldn't trade places with anyone for the world...